By Nina Livingstone

What is a blind spot? It’s whatever is in the way of clarity. Blind spots are like the dust and stuff that messes up glasses, car and windows at home. After glass has been thoroughly cleaned, all the dust, spots, and gunk are gone. Everything seems fresh and clean, spotless! When light is shed on a blind spot that’s been creating difficult situations, we can experience a feeling of freshness, clarity, and spotlessness within.

Did you ever have a blind spot when you go shopping and can’t find something you need, even though you know it’s somewhere right in front of you? Do you ask for help and then watch how easy it is for the other person to find what you are looking for?

In a more complex situation, a blind spot may be a prejudice against a person because he unconsciously reminds us of something unpleasant about our father. He may actually be a kind-hearted man, and a loving father with his children.

Have you ever been repeatedly attracted to people who are selfish, irresponsible, or neglectful? Perhaps they have been more deeply confused, and behave in self-destructive and violent ways with themselves and others. A blind spot may create an unexplained attraction again and again, to the same kind of unhealthy friend or lover.

Or, we might be cut off on the highway and have an anxiety attack after it’s over even though we have not been hurt. Whatever’s behind the anxiety attack could be called a blind spot.

It often takes time to get to know what’s in the way of clarity. Our immediate judgments are colored by unconscious memories and experiences that get in the way of our clarity. Blind spots can darken our perceptions, so that we don’t actually see the world as it is. And we live much of our life without being aware that we even have them!

An Excellent Question

We might ask,” How can I see my blinds spots when I’m blind to them?” An excellent question. And the question itself is the beginning of the path to clarity. For we must first recognize the fact that we have blind spots, realize we want to shed light on them, and then wonder about what’s next.

What Happens?

When we notice we have a blind spot, we usually respond in one of two ways— either with fear or with curiosity.

With fear, we instinctively recoil from a blind spot. We may argue with it, “It’s not the right time.” Or “I could never do that.” Perhaps we fear the end of a relationship if we explore our blind spot. Or, we may even fear the end of our life, as we ignore the body’s messages about illness and do nothing about it.

Whether we call it fear, self-judgment, or a sense of shame, a moment of awareness of a blind spot can be uncomfortable. We quickly shift the experience to something more comfortable and familiar, by ignoring or covering up our awareness with busyness, entertainment, eating, or whatever else we may find to fill the space.

Cycles of avoiding and ignoring come to end when we have had enough pain and wonder what we might do differently. It helps to see the blind spot as an opportunity pointing our way to less pain and confusion, and to be curious about it.

It’s been said the angels set closed doors before us, or blind spots, and they have all the patience in the world, as they wait for us to open one door at a time. It’s up to each of us to be curious about what’s on the other side, and open each door when we are ready.

Great curiosity may be aroused when we notice how blind we are. With enough courage and clarity to keep us from getting entangled in our habits of self-blame, etc., we may understand blind spots as opportunities for adventure and discovery. We can then begin to experience awareness of blind spots with more openness, and take the time to bring curiosity to what’s happening.

Finding Patience

It’s good to understand that uncovering blind spots is a process that takes time, so we can have the necessary patience to keep going. We all have so many blind spots, there is a lifetime’s worth of discovery ahead.

It’s also important to remember, that it’s easier to take on one blind spot at a time. Becoming overwhelmed by thinking, “I have to do them all now!” doesn’t work to do anything except stress us out as we push against reality. One blind spot at a time, one moment at a time, is a compassionate intention that really works. Intention helps when we realize we feel stuck, because then we wonder what’s behind the feeling.

Finding Help

Just as when we find help when we are shopping, we often need help from others to guide us in the right direction, to help us see what’s there. We can notice who shows up as we open to this exploration. It’s not just a cliché that when the student is ready, the teacher appears.

In the end, and it may very well be in the end of this life, we have either embraced the gift behind our doors, or successfully nurtured our blind spots. If we don’t open the doors in this life, many people believe they will be waiting for us the next time around.

Might as well open that door, and shine light on a blind spot!

By the way, don’t worry about which one should be first—any door that opens lets light shine on a blind spot— and is a good one, and so is the next, and the next, and the next.

©2005 Nina Livingstone.

Nina Livingstone is a meditation teacher, counselor, writer and speaker, specializing in secular awareness meditation and self-inquiry. Nina is currently writing a book called Let’s Not Call It Meditation: Practical Information for People who Think They Can’t Sit Still and Quiet the Mind. She is the author of three meditation CDs: Remembering Awareness, Uncovering Compassion, and A Forgiveness Meditation. Nina has a column called Living with Awareness in New Health Digest and is a regular contributor to Nature’s Wisdom magazine. She has had extensive experience in Zen Buddhism, meditation, and self-inquiry with Roshi Philip Kapleau (TheThree Pillars of Zen) and Toni Packer (The Wonder of Presence). email:nina@healingwithawareness.com website: www.healingwithawareness.com

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Nina Livingstone

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www.healingwithawareness.com

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